‘That Clever Line’ is a collection of poems dealing with the mixed emotions of love and pain. It was inspired primarily by one muddled experience. In the summer of 2000, a girl I had been dating seriously was in a severe car accident only days before I was probably going to break up with her. I still had feelings for her, but knew the relationship was a dead end. Love, concern, heartbreak, and anger all find a place in different pieces of the narrative.
Posted April 20, 2004, 4:22 p.m.
She’s like a magnet
Pullin’ you away
Reordering your brain
She’s like a crime
She’s like a bad dream
Repeatin’ every night
And I’ve got second sight
She’s like a lie
And you think you can’t do better
So you stay . . . you stick
You love the way she kills you every day
She’s like a cougar
Biting at your neck
Spicking at your speck
She’s like a dream
And you think you can’t do better
So you stay . . . you stick
You love the way she kills you every day
She’s like a magnet
Repel and then attract
Love and then attack
She’s like a dream

Posted March 20, 2004, 11:23 a.m.
Today the road salt melts away
‘Cause it’s the first spring-time rain
Winter fades in shortened nights
I forget the curve of your face
All the hatred, needing your space
Too late to finally set things right
It’s spring-time now, the cold is gone
Thunderheads gather in the west
It’s spring-time now, and I’ve moved on
You know as well as I, it’s for the best
Today the road salt melts away
And underneath it’s still the same
Concrete slabs and solid forms
It’s wrapped in a layer of lace
So that’s a fact I’ve got to face
First day rains, springtime storms
It’s spring-time now, the cold is gone
Thunderheads gather in the west
It’s spring-time now, and I’ve moved on
You know as well as I, it’s for the best

Posted March 19, 2004, 4:24 p.m.
She’s got you by the neck, man
But you’ve got breathing to do
I know you think she’s somethin’
She’s somethin’ using you
Out of reach, out of range
Sittin’ still, nothin’ gonna change
And now you’ve sold your soul for a touch?
You know love ain’t worth that much.
She’s got you by the heart, man
But you’ve got beating to do
Now she’s got to give you somethin’
And what’s it worth to you?
Out of reach, out of range
Sittin’ still, nothin’ gonna change
And now you’ve sold your soul for a touch?
You know love ain’t worth that much.
She’s got you.
She’s got you.

Posted March 4, 2004, 4:25 p.m.
Left a note tacked to the bedpost
Said you’d gone some other way
You took a train to California
‘Cause I’d never been out that way
It’s been six months
The phone rings, just a breath now
A bit of static down the line
I’m no fool, I know it’s you
You know I’ll answer every time
It’s been forever
And will the trumpets wail
For your triumphant return?
Will they cry your name in glory?
Will the sun blot out the
Shadow of your false love?
Left your papers in the basement
‘Case you ever come through this way
Like to torch them with this dead house
God, I feel like flames today
It’s been six months
And will the trumpets wail
For your triumphant return?
Will they cry your name in glory?
Will the sun blot out the
Shadow of your false love?
The phone rings, just a breath now
A bit of static down the line
Like to torch them with this dead house
God, I feel like flames today
It’s been forever

Posted November 10, 2001, 4:27 p.m.
I don’t know why I stay here anymore
All I know, I’m tired of singing this song
I’m still hurting, wrong or right, day and night
And here I am
Yeah, here I am
Tell me what you’re thinking, drive me to the ground
Tell me when you’re calling and how much I love the sound
Tell me what I’m losing and just what it is you’ve found . . .
Tell me what I’m losing and just what it is you’ve found . . .
And it’s a cruel, cruel affair
So why, why, why . . .
Why should I care?

Posted November 10, 2001, 4:23 p.m.
I’m stark
Stark raving mad
It’s true
True what they say
That I’m crazy, a liar
I’m cold and I’m tired
Got reasons and feelings
Got frost all four seasons
Got love . . .
Just a little more left
I’m stuck
Stuck standing here
And I know
What you’re tryin to do
Say I’m crazy, a liar
I’m cold and I’m tired
Got reasons and feelings
Got frost all four seasons
Got love . . .
Just a little more left
So shut up for a minute
Let’s talk about things
Let’s talk about you and me and everything
In between
Let’s talk about life and death and family
And our eternity together
Together while you turn and walk
Turn and walk
Turn and walk the other way
I’m stark
Stark raving mad
It’s true
True what they say
That I’m crazy, a liar
I’m cold and I’m tired
Got reasons and feelings
Got frost all four seasons
Got love . . .
Just a little more left

Posted November 10, 2001, 11:09 a.m.
I don’t know what to say to you anymore
All I know is everything’s all wrong
I’m still hurting, wrong or right, day and night
So here I am
So here I am
Tell me what you’re thinking, drive me to the ground
Tell me when you’re calling and how much I love the sound
Tell me what I’m losing and just what it is you’ve found . . .
Tell me what I’m losing and just what it is you’ve found . . .
And it’s a sad, sad affair
So why, why, why . . .
Why should I care?

Posted October 15, 2001, 4:29 p.m.
And twenty minutes later
I think of all the things I
Wanted to say
I think of that clever line
That pointed word
That would have made you
Understand
I just wanted you to understand
I just wanted you to see
I needed you to pretend you knew
Just why I couldn’t be
Everything you wanted
Everything you wanted
Everything you didn’t know
You wanted
Don’t you know
I always hate it
When it’s over
And now I know that clever line
That pointed word
But you’ve turned away
Before I had the chance to make you
Understand

Posted October 15, 2001, 4:28 p.m.
You know I could just turn and walk away
Just give up and disappear
But it’s not my style, I’m not the kind
To go and leave you here
And you’re everything I’ve searched for all my life
So maybe we could try to work it out
Pull our anger back inside
We could draw our lines out in the sand
Tug the reigns and pass the time
‘Cause you’re everything I’ve searched for all my life
And so I look at you now
You’ve still got that pretty face
Still got that wavy hair, that funny walk
Your flawless music taste
And so I look at you now
I can’t look away from you
‘Cause through all the tries, and all the lies
I don’t know what else to do
I can’t make you see what’s in my heart
Or make you stay or watch you leave
I could never hold you close to me
When you need your room to breathe
But you’re everything I’ve searched for all my life
And so I look at you now
You’ve still got that pretty face
Still got that wavy hair, that funny walk
Your flawless music taste
And so I look at you now
I can’t look away from you
‘Cause through all the tries, and all the lies
I don’t know what else to do
And so I look at you now
I can’t look away from you
‘Cause through all the tries, and all the lies
I still don’t know what I should do

Posted October 15, 2001, 11:23 a.m.
I don’t know what to say
I’m lost for words anymore
Tryin’ to figure out now
What you did this to me for
And time goes by
I don’t know what to say
I’m sorry I let you down
Lookin’ for my answers
And the love I never found
And time goes by
I’m sorry
I’m so sorry
I never said goodbye
I never told you why
Time goes by
Time goes by
I don’t know what to say
Was holding you too close
Now I’ve lost you, I know
That’s just the way it goes
When time goes by
I don’t know what to say
Wish I could change the past
I know I broke your heart
Though I wanted this to last
But time goes by
I’m sorry
I’m so sorry
And time goes by
Yeah, time goes by
I’m sorry
I’m so sorry
It’s too late to try
Time goes by
It’s too late to try
And time goes by

Posted October 15, 2001, 11:01 a.m.
No
No more love songs
No more heart songs
No more
No more
No
You know the mountains
They look much colder
In the winter
They’ve got their little
Snowcaps and bare trees
In the winter
And the leaves may be falling
But it’s okay
Yeah, you know it’s okay
Because I’m falling too
But . . .
No
No more love songs
No more heart songs
No more
No more
No
You know your eyes looked
So much brighter before
You lied to me
It’s hard to pretend
I feel the same when
You lied to me
And yeah, the leaves are falling
But it’s okay
Yeah, you know it’s okay
Because I’m falling too
I’m trying not to say I’m sorry
For hurting like I do
And maybe I’ve got every right
To blame you
No
No more love songs
No more heart songs
No more
No more
No

Posted March 10, 2001, 4:26 p.m.
Hey, hey
I’m gone away
I’m here to stay
Anyway
That’s real
That’s just how
It goes, suppose
After all
Who knows
Hey, hey
I’m gone away
And who’s to say
Anyway
Anyway
Anyway
Anyway

Posted October 11, 2000, 11:26 a.m.
Rat in a maze
Heart in a daze
So overplayed
Neutered or spayed
I feel like I’m chasing
Like I’m chasing
A rat in a maze
It’s not for you
It’s not for me
It’s not about anything
You touch or see
It’s not for right
It’s not for wrong
Just words for a song
Rat in a maze
Out of this place
Haze of midday
Steals words I say
I feel like I’m chasing
Like I’m chasing
A rat in a maze
It’s not for you
It’s not for me
It’s never been for
Anything you see
It’s not for right
It’s not for wrong
And so ends this song

Posted October 10, 2000, 4:24 p.m.
I never thought I’d run into you again
You’ve haunted me through so many different faces
I never thought I’d hafta fight you again
But whoever I use, it’s you filling the empty spaces
After all the years and the different things I’ve done
However many times I think I’ve found the one
I always keep running right back into you again
And every time the light may seem brighter
But when it dies out, it’s always so dark
Each new cycle I fail to see just who you are
And every time I try my damnedest
To keep your people safe and warm
A lost cause, like chasing a shooting star
Like chasing a dream
I never thought I’d run into you again
But you shine your darkness through so many hearts
I never thought I’d hafta fight you again
Never learned how to recognize you each new start
And after all the pain and all the times I’ve lost
No matter how many times the stars be crossed
I just keep running right back into you again
And every time the light may seem brighter
But when it dies out, it’s always so dark
Each new cycle I fail to see just who you are
And every time I try my damnedest
To keep your people safe and warm
A lost cause, like chasing a shooting star
Like chasing a dream
I never thought I’d run into you again
But you’re hard to miss, being everything and everyone
I never thought I’d hafta fight you again
But I will, sure as the rising and setting of the sun
And after all is said and done it’s not me
And whether or not it’s you, I just can’t see
But I just keep running right back into you again
And every time the light may seem brighter
But when it dies out, it’s always so dark
Each new cycle I fail to see just who you are
And every time I try my damnedest
To keep your people safe and warm
A lost cause, like chasing a shooting star
Like chasing a dream
I never thought I’d run into you again
You’ve haunted me through a hundred different faces
I never thought I’d hafta fight you again
And I’m always left with all these empty spaces
I’ve made mistakes, God knows this much is true
But at least I could never be quite so cold as you
. . . again?

Posted October 10, 2000, 4:23 p.m.
I can remember how I drove every day
To see you
Even though you couldn’t see me
It’s nice to know that meant nothing
I’d listen to the album you bought me
On the way
Just because it made me feel a little better
And maybe none of it meant anything
I prayed so hard every night for your pain
To go away
. . . What can I say?
It’s nice to know that it all meant nothing
Four Minutes, the song still rings in my head
It would haunt me every time I laid down in my bed
Four Minutes, the song still gives me shivers
Even as the feelings that they were wither
Four Minutes, sometimes I feel like going home
And you swear you’ll never let things go by again
I can remember how I left you when you needed me most
Ha!
Guess you didn’t hear my voice over the hum
Of the respirator . . .

Posted October 10, 2000, 11:02 a.m.
I could love you forever
I could hold you ’til I couldn’t anymore
I could give you everything
Everything I could ever give you
And I could hold your hand
Touch your life
But
Does anybody want me?
Anybody know my name?
Anybody need me?
Or is this all just a game?
Anybody feel me?
Or have I just gone insane?
Anybody want me?
Anybody know my name?
I could build us forever
I could take you places you’ve only dreamed
I could give you everything
Everything you could ever want
And I could hold your hand
Touch your life
Ohh
Eye for an eye
Tooth for a tooth
Punishment in kind
Day after day
Night after night
Maybe I’m losing my mind
And
Does anybody want me?
Anybody know my name?
Anybody need me?
Or is this all just a game?
Anybody feel me?
Or have I just gone insane?
Anybody want me?
Anybody know my name?

Posted July 28, 2000, 4:28 p.m.
I don’t remember what it’s like to feel at home
Can’t remember the names of where I’ve been
Can’t seem to place all the familiar faces
Or chronicle all of the whys and whens
But I know that there’s a somewhere that fits me
Like a glove, or maybe mittens from youth
And I’ll know, yes I’ll know when I’m homebound
Like weary eyes can always follow truth
And when the road forks, you’ll go left
Like the secrets or the promises that you’ve kept
And as the world stretches out in your headlights
I hate to tell you I was right
I don’t remember what it’s like to be lonely
Sometimes lonely is all I have to be
Maybe sometimes silence speaks too loudly
And sometimes it takes more than one voice to sing
So as I drive this lonesome southern highway
I think of just how close I really came
The thoughts keep wafting through my head
I know that things will never be the same
And when the road forks, you’ll go left
Like the secrets or the promises that you’ve kept
And as the world stretches out in your headlights
I hate to tell you I was right
I can’t remember what it’s like to cry
Can’t remember all the things I’ve left undone
Can’t seem to come to terms with the world’s turning
Or simplistic reasons for everything and everyone
But I know there are other souls searching
Beneath this endless twilight sky
And sometimes you’ve just got to say hello
Before you can learn to say goodbye

Posted July 28, 2000, 4:22 p.m.
Sometimes I feel like I’m lost inside
This prison
I know it ain’t lookin’ all too good
Sometimes I just feel so alone
So alone and maybe
It’s just how I’m meant to be
Can’t you see, can’t you see
And I wanna make you see
What I see, what I see
I wanna let you know
What I know, what I know
I wanna open your eyes
And show you the world
So maybe in the dreams of this old soul
We could find some solace
‘Cause we could use some now
Maybe if you’d just hold on to me
We’d both feel better
But you know that’s not meant to be
Yeah you know, yeah you know
I wanna make you see
What I see, what I see
I wanna let you know
What I know, what I know
I wanna open your eyes
And show you the world
I don’t know what’s truth or lie
It’s the truth that hurts me
I feel like maybe that’s the best now
Sometimes I just want to go to sleep
It’d be good for me
But I’m afraid to close my eyes
Close your eyes, close your eyes
Yeah, I wanna keep you away
From this world, from this world
I don’t want you to know
What I know, what I know
I wanna hold you forever
Forever

Posted June 20, 2000, 4:21 p.m.
In the moment of impact
The silence as time halts
. . .
Bodies broken metal bending
Never-ending
Life flashes before your eyes
And you see everything
You see everything
You see
All the people who have loved you
All the things that you will miss
All the people you have touched
The mem’ries of a soft kiss
But it fades like moments of clarity
Always seem to do
They always seem to do

Posted June 20, 2000, 4:21 p.m.
Shrieking metal crumples
Like a million carefree dreams
And it’s only a waking moment
Or a message on the breeze
Raving to the skies of sanity
In a reckless groggy state
It’s often so easy to question
The painful decisions of fate
I’m calling for you
Babe can’t hear me now
I’m calling for you
Just can’t touch you now
I’m calling for you
Blank eyes don’t see me now
Blank eyes can’t see me now
Screaming bodies crumple
Like a million unfinished songs
It’s only a festering silence
That we’ve understood all along
Asking for lone inspiration
Or searching for innocence lost
Who out there has the energy
To pay this heavenly cost?
I’m calling for you
Babe can’t hear me now
I’m calling for you
Just can’t touch you now
I’m calling for you
Blank eyes don’t see me now
Blank eyes can’t see me now

Posted December 1, 1999, 4:21 p.m.
Curves distract my fuzzy mind
And I realize how much I need you
Disconnected moments of honesty
And I notice how much I care
One sweet moment of perfection
And I realize how much I love you
One sweet moment, it all changes
One sweet moment, understand
One sweet moment, girl I need you
One sweet moment, hold my hand
You distract my unclear mind
But you know how much I need you
Thoughts, might be going nowhere
But you know I’ll always care
In one sweet moment of perfection
God, you know I love you
One sweet moment, it all changes
One sweet moment, understand
One sweet moment, girl I need you
One sweet moment, hold my hand

Posted December 1, 1999, 11:28 a.m.
Moments cease
Rain stops falling
I touch you
Silently
Time stops
Reaching out
I need you
Reaching out
I miss you
Breaths halt
Snow stops flaking
I caress
Silently
Time stops
Reaching out
I need you
Reaching out
I miss you
Reaching out
I need you
Reaching out
I miss you
I miss you
I miss you

Posted December 1, 1999, 11:25 a.m.
He’s not your friend anymore
Because you don’t want him to be
He cannot care for you now
Because you just couldn’t see
He’s all alone in the universe
And you helped put him there
That is why you’re hurting
And he doesn’t care . . . doesn’t care
There was a time, so long ago
When he wanted you so bad
You were always on his side
Understood the dreams he had
But you faded and left him
Without your loving stares
And that is why you’re hurting
And he doesn’t care . . . doesn’t care
Did you break him with your good intentions?
Fear him in your heart?
Did you hurt him with your smile inventions?
Fear him from the start?
He just cannot stop thinking
This world is so unfair
But regardless of it all
He’ll always care . . . always care

Posted October 1, 1999, 11:42 a.m.
Love is mightier than the sword
Never were lies so concise in their words
Between us circumstance destroyed
To you I was merely just a toy
Loving words from you I hear
So I asked for pain or fear
Whatever you say, dear
All I can say is I need you here
I don’t need the pain or fear
But, whatever you say, dear
You speak wonders and never say a word
Fleeting, hurting, flying like a bird
I’ve never found myself quite so annoyed
As in the time while I was toyed
I wish that I were holding you near
But all I get is pain or fear
Whatever you say, dear
All I can say is I need you here
I don’t need the pain or fear
But, whatever you say, dear
Love or hate
‘Tis the great debate
And when I need you near
All I get is pain or fear
Whatever you say, dear
Whatever you say . . .
All I can say is I need you here
I don’t need the pain or fear
But, whatever you say, dear
Whatever you say . . .

Posted September 1, 1999, 4:25 p.m.
I feel like I’m part of the problem
Days blighted by the dark
And I keep feeling as if
My eyes have lost the spark
There’s a burning somewhere in my past
A mistake that I may have made
Is it in some way my fault
The utopia has been delayed
Maybe I could have been different
And maybe I still can change
I wish I could sing so much louder
But it’s out of my range
Today will not be my tomorrow
And tomorrow cannot be today
The light in my eyes has gone out
And I’ve run out of things to say

Posted September 1, 1999, 11:03 a.m.
Unable to define this moment in time
I reach out into the cold dark night
Trying to determine if I’m here alone
Fighting back the years of muffled light
Finding nobody here I recede once again
Into the confines of self-pity and spite
Wond’rin desperately was I really alone
When I reached out into the night
Are they lying to me when they tell me
In their letters when they say they were here?
Were they pulling my chain when they drove me insane
And told me I had nothing to fear?
Unable to define my place in the line
I’m trying so hard to fly away
I wonder if there’s a such thing as destiny
And if there’s much more for me to say
So when it gets down to the line
And we realize deep down that we’re alone
We can ask all the questions and tell all our lies
But no one will help us carry the stone
And were they lying to me when the told me
In their letters when they say they were here?
Are they pulling my chain as they drive me insane
Is it true I have nothing to fear?

Posted April 10, 1999, 11:25 a.m.
Hey babe
Let’s go out
Let’s have fun
Let’s fall in love
Let’s add another name
To my list of broken hearts
Hey babe
Let’s give it a shot
Give it a try
Maybe it’ll work
But try to avoid slicing
Open my soul, okay?

Scott Bradford has been building web sites and using them to say what he thinks since 1995, which tended to get him in trouble with power-tripping assistant principals at the time. He holds a bachelor’s degree in Public Administration from George Mason University, but has spent most of his career (so far) working on public- and private-sector web sites. He is not a member of any political party, and brands himself an ‘independent constitutional conservative.’ In addition to holding down a day job and blogging about challenging subjects like politics, religion, and technology, Scott is also a devout Catholic, gun-owner, bike rider, and music lover with a wife and two cats.