PalmOne to Acquire Iraq

Posted April 1, 2005, 7:30 p.m.

Today, the first day of April, PalmOne announced that it plans to acquire Iraq for an undisclosed amount of cash and stock. PalmOne is the maker of the Zire and Tungsten PDAs and Treo smartphones, while Iraq is a fledgeling middle-eastern Democracy recovering from decades of tyrants, economic sanctions, and war.

“This is a wonderful opportunity for PalmOne to diversify into fighting stubborn insurgencies and nation-building,” said one PalmOne executive. “After all, it’s not like the PDA industry has any better prospects at this point.”

The deal must still receive a final go-ahead from PalmOne stockholders and U.S. regulators, both of whom are expected to approve.

Scott Bradford has been putting his opinions on his website since 1995—before most people knew what a website was. He has been a professional web developer in the public- and private-sector for over twenty years. He is an independent constitutional conservative who believes in human rights and limited government, and a Catholic Christian whose beliefs are summarized in the Nicene Creed. He holds a bachelor’s degree in Public Administration from George Mason University. He loves Pink Floyd and can play the bass guitar . . . sort-of. He’s a husband, pet lover, amateur radio operator, and classic AMC/Jeep enthusiast.

Quotes

For creation without the Creator fades into nothingness.

The things Congress does best are nothing and overreacting.

There is no true peace without fairness, truth, justice and solidarity.

Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.

If a man has a genuine, sincere, hearty wish to get rid of his liberty, if he is really bent upon becoming a slave, nothing can stop him.

Everywhere I go I’m asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don’t stifle enough of them.

Sell not virtue to purchase wealth, nor Liberty to purchase power.

Progressivism will hollow out your religion and wear its skin like a trophy.

In all toil there is profit, but mere talk tends only to want.

The greatest scientists in history are great precisely because they broke with the consensus. There is no such thing as consensus science. If it’s consensus, it isn’t science. If it’s science, it isn’t consensus.

In most projects, the first system built is barely usable. It may be too slow, too big, awkward to use, or all three. There is no alternative but to start again, smarting but smarter, and build a redesigned version in which these problems are solved.

But if you warn the wicked to turn from his way, and he does not turn from his way; he shall die in his iniquity, but you will have saved your life.

[A conservative is] a statesman enamored of existing evils, as opposed to a liberal, who wants to replace them with others.

Some seem to believe that we should negotiate with the terrorists and radicals, as if some ingenious argument will persuade them they have been wrong all along. . . . We have an obligation to call this what it is: the false comfort of appeasement, which has been repeatedly discredited by history.

Your room is not your prison. You are.

Servitude cannot be complete if the press is free: the press is the chiefest democratic instrument of freedom.

All collective judgments are wrong. Only racists make them.

Socialism of any type leads to a total destruction of the human spirit and to a leveling of mankind into death.

Where the people fear the government you have tyranny. Where the government fears the people you have liberty.

Interest groups . . . are made up of people who willingly support those groups with their time and money. They aren’t some diabolical, nebulous enemy of our democracy; they ARE democracy.

Tangent Theme:	26.0.48
Tangent Plugin:	6.0.111

Go to Top	`tt`
Go to Bottom	`tb`
Search	`ts`
Main Content	`tc`
Open Gallery (if present)	`tg`
Open Flagpole	`tf`
Keyboard Shortcuts	`tk`
Site Information	`ti`

Main Menu

X

Site Information

Keyboard Shortcuts